Bloody Hot

We measured the temperature at 64deg today although it’s all a bit hit and miss because we only have car temperatures and peoples watches to go by and they are not generally very accurate – however, I would like to say, publicly, that I think that today has been the hottest I have ever been, anywhere in the world, ever.

You're on trivial titbits tonight – whether you like it or not because I can't be bothered to think up a theme for the night !

We’ll start with the best bit – I’ve got a Snicker bar in the fridge ! I have moved down to site today and although I am in one of the scabbier cabins (which are, apparently, not worthy of fizzy drink and chocolate) I happened to be hanging around outside one of the posh cabins (which are, apparently, entitled to fizzy drink and chocolate) whilst the little man was filling the fridges with chocolate. I simply did what any white expatriate does in these circumstances – I asked him for a couple of bars with a big smile on my face ! Job done. Female boss ecstatic, Ianiepoos in everyone’s good books, life incredibly simple !

Whilst we’re on the subject of my good books, most of you will find this hard to believe, actually there are several things you are going to find hard to believe, like me being regarded as the level headed peace maker around here…….I know, I find that one hard to believe myself actually. Tracey will find the next one more difficult to believe than some of you, but today I heard myself being described as “always cheerful”. Hehe. I might need to discuss these insights too sides of my character that some of you were not previously aware of, with my wife first, but if it makes you any happier the poor woman got the short end of a grumpy I was having last night after I had posted on here (the one about inter office politics). To her eternal credit she let me rant, which was what I needed to do, talked some sense that I understood (with a little sympathy mixed in) and I was fine after that. Back top my old cheery self this morning !

I am quite glad I am down on site for a few days as I am getting a bit de-mob happy and being here will take my mind off it for a bit each day and get me through another sleep. I don’t actually know how long I am going to be here for but I have to be back on the COB on Sunday ready to Fly to Dubai on Monday (it sounds so simple when you say it like that !). The bad thing is that there is no gym and running round camp has been outlawed by the security boffins who seem to think we will get taken out by a sniper. These things all seem a bit far fetched to everyone (except people who can make more profit by providing more close protection security……but that’s just a cynical view and we shouldn’t take security lightly !). Besides, you don’t really need to run anywhere when the temperature is 147 deg C, you lose weight when you’re out in it, simply by breathing !

I was just wondering what photo’s to put in today’s blog and it reminded me that my new camera has arrived at home, which is jolly exciting I can tell you. I can’t wait to get back and start taking pictures of juniors pointing in France ready for coming back to site in September and getting on with some serious pointing !

I thought a couple of photos of my current environment for you today. The first is of my site office………..



And the second, taken from one of the guard towers, shows the prison walls behind which I am locked every night (to stop the snipers being able to see me). In the foreground of that picture (to the left) you can see the beginning of the slab being laid for the tennis courts and the 5-a-side football pitch. It will be interesting to be able to take pictures in a few months time and do before and after shots.

Oh, and whilst I think about it, the COB got hit by 13 rockets last night……I was on the phone at the time to Tracey and I remember saying that the cabin was rocking and that someone must be moving some furniture. Then I had to get up and go to the door to listen to the tanoy giving the all clear and I went back to the phone and remember saying to Tracey that the whole place smelt of smoke but there wasn’t anyone running about and no sirens so it must all be some kind of exercise. Apparently certain kinds of weather stops the Phalinx from spotting the incoming missiles and we just have to keep our heads down…….or carry on chatting to the wife as if you haven’t heard anything ! Several people slept through it as well, which is how I’d like to be when I’m hit by a rocket thank you very much !

Today’s inventory

3 cigars so far………..

0 units

$0 dollars

Weather – the hottest day of my life

Food – a Snickers bar in the fridge, cigar-snickers, cigar-snickers, lung cancer-heart disease, the agony of choice……..

Gym – no gym today, 30 each of press-ups, sit-ups, tricep dips and a sort of pull-up on the upper level of the bunk bed. And about 3 miles of walking in this heat. I have discovered that the Clients security company have got themselves a full set of weights under one of the guard towers (unless it’s the clients) and I shall have to make investigations in the morning……..

Countdown – 9 sleeps till Dubai and 10 till home !

A Topsy Turvey World

Today I went back to site for the first time in a week – which was nice.

I went to meetings, had lunch, went to meetings, took some photos, came home.

Went to the gym, had a cold supper from the fridge, wrote my blog, spoke to my family on Skype and went to bed.

It’s not very interesting when you put it like that is it ?

They gave me a gun…….

Calm down, they took it away again fairly quickly………


The first meeting was with the client who has just got back from leave and is happy with the progress we have made over 3 weeks (so we’re happy…….for mostly different reasons to him, but we won’t split hairs !) We have to go away and design a 25m pool for him now – run of the mill stuff in the middle of the desert but if he wants it and he’s willing to pay for it then who are we to argue !

Lunch was, if you’ll believe me, chicken nuggets, chips, green beans and a dhal poured over the beans……with mayonnaise obviously ! I definitely need to get back to the normality of a sandwich, because, apart from one second-rate burger a few days ago, I don’t think I have had anything between two pieces of bread since I had a Big Mac (testing their theory that they are the same the world over – which they seem to be) at Dubai airport. Normally I would be lucky to go 5 days without one, never mind 5 weeks !

The photos were fun and no doubt will trickle onto various people’s Facebooks.

We drove back a different way today, which took a closer to Mosque that I took a picture of very early on in my stay…..

And closer to a pile of old tanks at the end of the airport which we have seen in the distance every time we have come back to the COB but never been anywhere near before……

I’m off to live on site again tomorrow (I know, I’ve said it before…..) which is really the final stretch before I’m back at the COB and away to Dubai on the first leg of the journey home. We’re nearly close enough to start the countdown……just not quite ready yet.

Today’s inventory

4 cigars – sorry, but there’s a bit of a rhythm developing, which with a bit of luck will be solved by doing something different tomorrow…..we shall see.

$2 – on tea and a big biscuit (with chocolate bits in….)

0 units – although I have to say, for whatever reason, I could do with a drink this evening. It might be something to do with heading home soon or it might be something to do with the end of the day where I think I got caught in the crossfire of somebody else’s office politics (which always hacks me off – why do they have to include me, can’t they see I’ve got my own problems to worry about ? It’s not like I wander about looking like I give a shit !)

Weather – today was a vast improvement on yesterday but I could still feel the sweat running down my back whilst I was standing still, which isn’t very nice, even at the best of times.

Food – I’m starting to get bored with the range of food served here, and before you say it, I know I should be grateful, and I am, but it’s beef or chicken pretty much every meal (except breakfast when we have beef sausages and beef rashers but no chicken – at least I can have my new friend Mr Porridge). Must bring some Marmite back with me !

Gym – back to full speed tonight. I had the whole place to myself and sang along to my ipod for most of my time on the cross-trainer. It must have been dreadful, the sort of gym equivalent to singing in the shower, but it made me happy and passed the time.

Right, time for my bath – NURSE ?

A Foggy Day in Basra

I started badly this morning by panicking because I woke up and groped around for my watch and then made the mistake of looking at it with bleary dry eyes and no glasses – it said 0800hrs. This was followed by a 10 second period (that seemed like a lifetime) in which I panic looked for my glasses and re-enacted the opening scene from Four Weddings and a Funeral, closely followed by sinking back into the pillow with the flooded relief which comes with realising that you had your watch upside down, and it is, in fact, only 10 past 6.

We’ll skip nonchalantly forward in time to opening my cabin door an hour later and being hit by a wall of hot moisture. I suppose, to be realistic, you couldn’t call it fog, you could see through it to start with, and it wasn’t cold and clammy like proper English fog, but just humidity on a major scale. The last time we had “weather” here was a couple of weeks ago when we had some cloud which just burnt off within a couple of hours, but this stuff has hung around all day. Walking backwards and forwards to the canteen at lunchtime (about 15mins each way if you drag your heels……) was an experience, bathed in sweat by the time you get to each end and then dry out in an air-conditioned canteen or office in the same amount of time. They tell me that the weather in Dubai is like this all the time (and my limited experience of this bears this out – about 10 minutes outside air-conditioning) to the extent that drivers have their windscreen wipers on because the windows mist up on the outside !

Getting back to part 2 of Life On the COB. In an effort to become more modern and interactive, and to prove that even the most secret stuff is freely available on the internet, I thought you might like to see this:

(http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Phalanx_CIWS)

Firing at an incoming rocket……

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IqTyafBaDYM

It’s Thumping Thursday with poor visibility…… never a great combination I’m told, so keep your fingers crossed that we don’t need the Phalinx ! (there are several dotted about all over the place)

I think that’s enough for today. I’m off to site tomorrow so I think I will inflict you with some boring building site things (although it’s Friday so I suspect that not a lot will be happening !)

Today's quiz question, (it's multiple choice):

Was taking a picture of this sign a) brave, b) stupid, or c) taking the piss ?

Answers on the back of a £5 note - the judges decision is final and in the event of a tie I'll be in the Pictuerdrome drinking the prize fund. Lines close at 9, please continue to call after that because I need the money !

Today’s inventory:

4 cigars – cutting down was a good idea in theory……leaving me in a office with a smoker wasn’t !

0 units – again (boring !)

$0 Dollars – I did try and spend $2 on a coffee and a biscuit but someone else insisted on paying. I even gave them the money and they gave me it back – never let it be said I’m tight !

Weather – strangely misty for most of the day. The whole area was on Weather Code Red for most of the day as well. This means that the security companies find proper speeds and distances between vehicles a major problem with visibility down and communications a problem and therefore they can refuse to transport you unless you sign a waiver basically agreeing that if you all get killed then it’s your own fault. It wasn’t a problem for me as I haven’t moved from the COB all day. For the people who had got to site this morning and couldn’t get back however, it was a problem !

Food – nothing remarkable I’m afraid.

Gym – A good, steady sensible session (with plenty of water and electrolyte !)

Countdown – still too early to start thinking about it publicly. I can tell you though, in case I haven’t already, that I am proudly in possession of an e-ticket from Dubai to Birmingham – all I have to do now is track down the return portion of my Basra to Dubai flight and make sure it’s validated for the correct day and get my passport submitted for my exit visa (quite why you need to get a visa to get out is beyond me, maybe it’s the same as having to pay to get into Wales on the SSC ? which reminds me, my Welsh friends have to watch this if you haven’t already seen it……. I still haven’t decided yet if it’s ironic or funded by the tourist board)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aNfbX6uvA6s

Night all - X

Life on the COB (part 1)

Without compromising to many secrets (there are hundreds of Iraqis who work here and who deliver here every day – so it’s unlikely to be a secret, well, anything I’m going to tell you anyway). Someone also told me today that you can find all sorts of interesting things on Youtube if you feel inclined………..

As far as I can tell the COB (Continuity Operating Base) was set up by the British in 2003 during and after Operation Telec (the invasion of Iraq) and there are plenty of signs (like the one’s below, of their original occupation – regimental crests painted 10’ high on some of the T-Walls (T-Walls are the huge lumps of precast, moveable, concrete, interlocking walls that are used to surround everything here) as well as other less obvious signs, like labels on doors for ranks that I know are not part of the present scenery.

Not long after the war was over, the companies usually associated with picking the last meat from the bleached bones of a long dead carcass (often know as Aid Agencies, Private Security Companies and “Infrastructure Regeneration” Companies, arrived and set up adjacent to the military base, but under their protection.) All this is taking place in the area directly adjacent to the airport, so there is a certain amount of infrastructure already here, such as roads and buildings (just imagine the area around any airport). As these arrive and set up, so the T-Wall expands…….I don’t know how big the whole place is but it’s a hell of a long way to drive around it !

I’m telling you all this because as I told you yesterday, I have been stuck here for the last few days with very little supervision and a couple of long term blokes who seem to know where everything is – so consequently I have been led a little astray (in the working “unsupervised” category at least). Yesterday they took me to somewhere called Echos. Echos is a big café and looks (from the inside) very nice and very sort of “barny” (see below). It’s run by an Eastern European or Danish (I never got to the bottom of that bit) Christian Charity. They do far better food than you will get in any of the canteens (as far as I can tell) with a much wider selection, comfy chairs and tables, games you can borrow, a pool table, reading material etc. etc. etc.

When I mentioned to the boss that I had been there for the first time ever yesterday she immediately decided that we should all go for lunch – which was nice, and when one of the wags in the office piped up that Gilby was to tight to pay for lunch if he could get a free one (…….I may have mentioned that at some point in the past…..) she offered to buy everyone lunch – which was even nicer ! I’m afraid that I had to have a burger (a little disappointing) and chips with cheese (very nice thank you) but the best thing was hovering up someone else’s pizza when they were full because that was the dogs ! Pizza for me the next time someone offers to buy me lunch I can tell you (who said anything about tight ?).

Echos is in a little enclave of normality (a long as you ignore the sandbags, barbed wire and concrete) with an armoured church, to be seen to be believed,

And shops of varying quality and sort. I didn’t venture into the shops today because I can only take so much excitement at once, but I’m sure I will give them a visit before I’m through this time around.



I’ll take a few more pictures around the COB tomorrow and then we can do part 2 I think (now that I know certain things are not state secrets and that pictures are not necessarily a hanging offence). I’m allowed back on site on Friday and then I think I’ll go down and stay for a few days to try and kill some time before getting too excited about coming home…….

Today’s inventory:

4 cigars

0 units and $0 dollars (thanks to a nice boss’s generosity)

Gym – a good hour at 10% below previous capacity followed by 2 litres of fluid and a huge dinner (to go with the huge lunch)

Food – Huge lunch and a huge dinner. The dinner will stand out for a while because we had Baskin and Robbins Cookies and Cream Ice Cream – hoorah !

Countdown – wait for it………

Other items of note – (drum roll……….) my return flight is booked and I have an e-ticket ! I have also collected my permanent pass from the most miserable American woman, who clearly believes that I should be grateful for the opportunity to piss about for a month so that I can have a piece of plastic which does just the same thing my other piece of plastic does but with a photo – well, whoop dee do. On the upside I only had to be in her company for 2 minutes and 1 of those she was giving someone else a sarcastic bollocking for something he had absolutely no idea about, but he took it very well considering her has to see her again ! I suppose it takes all sorts.

I’ve finished this early tonight so if anything interesting happens tonight then you will just have to wait until tomorrow !

How To Amuse A 46 Year Old

We’re clearly scraping the bottom of the barrel for tonight’s topic but I thought I would try and give you an insight into what I am sure some of you will consider a level of sadness unsurpassed by even me over the years – and will have some of you nodding to yourselves whilst looking around to see if anyone is watching. Generally we’ll try and keep it clean though because I don’t want to have to answer embarrassing questions from my son, who I know tunes in on a regular basis !

Amusement for me, here at least, centres around 3 basic things – the gym, my new “friends” and my laptop.

The need for amusement stems from a need to pass a few minutes, which help pass the hours and into ticking off the days. It also comes from an understanding that very little is going to pop up unexpectedly (which round here is not a bad thing……) or as Norman Stanley used to say “keep your head down, your nose clean, do your porridge and get out”. We chuckled when we got up from dinner earlier this evening because as we were walking back from the office we had agreed we’d meet at 6.30 for dinner. It’s unwritten here that you don’t rush to be on time (unless you are close to being locked out of anywhere, like the COB for instance……) so 6.30 turns into 6.45 and you have passed another little bit. We chuckled because we had managed to make dinner last 35 mins in a self service canteen, and we had only managed 15 mins yesterday – some might consider that a little sad, to us, it’s culture !

Anyway, back to the plot – I haven’t been to the gym for a few days because of the stomach thing and it’s seriously impacted on a number of aspects of my life, time wasting being one of them (anorexia being another – I look at myself in the mirror now and all I see is a fat bloke !) – I could pass an hour and a half getting changed, working out, showering and changing again. Now I have to find something to fill in that time (I’m definitely going back to the gym tomorrow night by the way !).

My new friends are another source of amusement. I am calling them friends without really knowing if I will ever see them again outside of Iraq but they have accepted me, without question, into their little community and just assumed that I can get on and do my job (God alone knows why, but they seem happy enough after a month !). They all have a sense of mischief in their own way, even the boss, and I guess that’s compulsory in this sort of environment. They’ve also, as a rule, been doing this sort of thing for years and are conditioned to the whole process with it’s quirky rules and regulations. They are a bit like squaddies in a lot of ways (and a lot of them are , as I am, ex-squaddies), they know where to get a cup of tea at a moments notice, they can hide all day on a nothing task and they can generally scrounge anything.

Yesterday and today we have been a little free’er with our time and as the shop nearest us closed down today we went on a ride (just borrowed the keys to a Landrover) to find another shop on this vast site. We did actually know that there was one, I don’t want you to think we just wandered off in the vague expectation of finding something. The mission was to find “Del Boys” which I thought must just be a nickname but when we reached it, there it was, a huge sign proudly proclaiming Del Boys – on the site since 2003. (he must have come over the border with the first wave to have been here that long but you have to admire either the luck or the irony, of labelling that sort of entrepreneurial spirit in that way). Briefly, Del Boys is no great shakes but it will certainly provide for my basic needs and seems to have the longevity required to get me to Christmas if necessary.

Today they took me to the Ecos. The Ecos is a café (which I will probably elaborate on tomorrow because I am now planning 2 days ahead - and need photos really), and was almost certainly a British squaddies bar at some point. I had a decent cup of coffee, in a china mug, and a biscuit with bits in (they were supposed to be chocolate bits but I’m not sure……..). They had chocolate there as well, in a chiller cabinet. I’ve resisted thinking about it for 4 weeks but I have missed chocolate and was looking forward to some when I got home – I’m going to be strong though………probably.

It was nice – in the last two days I have travelled further around camp than the previous 4 weeks put together. I’ve no idea why, it’s just worked out that way. I think the boss is going to take me back there tomorrow so I might go really mad and have a muffin with my coffee !

The internet is probably a whole days subject in itself but as I have said before, if it wasn’t for Facebook, Skype and my blog I would have been swinging from the rafters long before now (not that there are any by the way). I know some of you are utterly addicted to some aspects of Facebook, as I am, and some of you despise them with the sort of passion that some women reserve for me ! But out here – they’re a heaven sent opportunity for entertainment and amusement ! I play scrabble with people on Facebook, word games with friends on Skype and indulge myself with my blog (I could get into this writing lark with a bit of encouragement) ! I think we can talk about this another day though so I want to keep my powder dry if I can !

Today’s inventory

A bit like yesterday really, 3 cigars so far, but I enjoyed sitting on the step in my pants staring at the moon and smoking a “special” so I suspect we may push up to 4 again today.

0 units

$1 dollar – on my biscuit (someone else bought the coffee)

No gym – but worried now that I’m getting fat again (have I moved seamlessly from alcoholism to an eating disorder ?)

Weather – boring, and from now on I shall only report on the weather by exception……like the one day in 4 weeks when we had some clouds for an hour !

Food – nothing much, apart from the biscuit. I did mix curry, stir fried noodles and sweetcorn salad together for dinner – that was fun (and tasted scrummy)

Countdown – still to many sleeps to worry about !

Skype conversations with Mohaia – 1 (I promised I’d give her a mention and that I’d weave it in subtly…… well, you can’t have everything I suppose !)

If Only

I remember thinking up a theme a little while ago about all the things I had brought with me that I didn’t need and all the things that I wished I had brought with me but didn’t realise I would need…….if you see what I mean. I think I mentioned it at some point but I’m to lazy to go back and have a look when it was, so you will just have to believe me (unless you want to go back and look and then let me know – they’ll be a small prize for anyone that does !)

Shouldn’t have brought

Top of the list of things I didn’t need is definitely the tie that I found at the bottom of my laptop bag, although to be fair, I’m not sure that it really counts, as although I brought it, and that cannot be denied, I didn’t know that I brought it – it stowed away so to speak, and I think that is the critical point m’lord……..

Second on the list is the jumper. This I knew I brought it but I didn’t know that I wouldn’t need it – however, I’m leaving it in the Gorilla Box because I knew I would need it but I just didn’t know when. It will cold at night in November and December I’m reliably informed, with temperatures dropping as low as freezing on odd occasions. This is probably borne out by the heater and the 2 blankets stashed in the wardrobe in the room.

Another thing, or things, that I haven’t really needed but would probably bring again, are all the DVD’s that I have brought to watch. There is a lot more to do here than you would imagine, what with sleeping, talking to the family on Skype and the internet. Who needs films ! I have watched a few episodes of Blackadder, a couple of the Godfathers and the Life Of Brian but I could probably have lived without them. I have a television in my room and in well over 4 weeks I have turned it on 3 times and one of those was to see what was on (nothing – those of you that complain that you have 300 hundred channels and they’re all rubbish, should have 300 channels in Arabic, then you’ll have something to complain about !). Having said all of that, I’ve just ordered the whole of the Father Ted collection from e-bay because I do think that once I’ve finally finished the Magic Mountain then I will have time to watch DVDs !

I’m sure there is some other crap laying around at the bottom of my bag that I shouldn’t have brought but it is so insignificant that I can’t even be bothered looking for it.

Should have brought

Marmite and gravy granules ! At home I live on toast and marmite for breakfast because I don’t drink milk, and if I ate bacon and eggs at every breakfast, I’d be the size of a house…….so perhaps someone could tell me why in Gods name did I think it would be any better in a Muslim country ? On the flip side however, I have gravitated back to porridge with sugar or honey. Whatever they make it with over here it isn’t real milk so it doesn’t effect my stomach – which is nice. The gravy thing really bugs me – there just isn’t any, ever. Sometimes there’s a sauce in which the beef or chicken is cooked but no gravy. For a man who likes a wet dinner, it’s a disaster – tonight you would have found me pouring spoonfuls of beef bourguignon sauce over my Sheppards pie and chips (I couldn’t resist it, sorry but I’ve got my appetite back and it feels like I haven’t eaten for a week – me thinks back to gentle gym tomorrow !).

I should have bought a camera to bring with me. It was agreed that the family camera should stay with the family and I had considered buying one at the airport, and then I thought it would be cheaper in Dubai where I never saw anything that remotely looked like a camera shop, in the airport or anywhere else for that matter. In the end I thought I could manage with my phone but I had brought the wrong lead with me to download pictures to my laptop (doh !). In the end I managed to borrow one of the firms (which I have to use to take pictures of site progress anyway, so it hasn’t been that big a problem after a while). I am about to buy one on line (…..darling….) and have it delivered to home for when I get back, so I can practice using it whilst we are in France on holiday. I have had time to do plenty of research into relative idiot proof photographic development (that the same as, “getting a better camera than the one I’ve already got, without spending too much money”, well, wasting too much money – but it doesn’t sound as good). Many thanks for my resident photographic genius……who’s actual words were something like “there’s more than enough features to keep you occupied” when I asked his advice on a particular model I was eying up.

I should have brought a day sack (you know, a little rucksack) or a little holdall to move things around in – this will be easily dealt with the next time because I shall only bring something like that back with me, whilst leaving the Gorilla Box here with all my Indiana Jones clothes in (I just thought of that analogy and I’m really rather pleased with it). I will probably dump the laptop bag as well, now the strap has broken and it looks like I am walking down the road with a briefcase (when I say road…….). I’ve got a laptop rucksack somewhere so I can just travel with the two small sacks – and I think we know a song about that don’t we children….

I think that’s enough things I should have brought although I’m sure I will think of something else at some point. There is one more category, which I shall try and keep brief for the moment but might come back to another day…….

Things that I brought which have been really useful.

My laptop, the webcam, my Piz Buin sunscreen, my cheap Decathlon sunglasses and my “trek mate” gadget thingy (it’s a tube of elasticated cloth, which you can make into various things: a hat, a scarf, a bandana etc but for me it has been fantastic as a sort of balaclava. I have been able to put it up over my head, ears, mouth and nose and with my sunglasses on I have been virtually safe from sandstorms - £10 from Blacks and a absolute bargain. I don’t know why I bought it but I’m bloody glad I did !).

Today’s inventory:

2 cigars (but I’m considering sitting on the step with one of my nice ones and celebrating my good health !)

0 dollars or units, or gym for that matter (although I think I might venture back tomorrow night……just don’t tell anyone)

Weather – started cool (which was a pleasant surprise) and then got f***ing hot this afternoon….luckily I was in an air-conditioned office cause I’m still confined to barracks until Saturday !

Food – nothing that I haven’t already mentioned

Countdown – we’re a few days away from single figure sleeps yet, so I think I will keep quiet for a few more days.

I meant to say a few days ago, sorry about the lack of Arabic but I’ve misplaced my book with all the packing and unpacking. It’s here somewhere and I’ll find it eventually – I promise. The same with photographs. This looks really boring without pictures but to be honest because I haven't been anywhere I haven't really seen anything to take pictures of........must try harder !

Nighty night, sleep tight and don’t let the bed bugs bite (like they do here………)

The Day After Yesterday 2

When I typed yesterdays blog, I was lying in the medical centre with a drip hanging out of my hand (which doesn’t make typing easy I can tell you). This is the story of what happened next………

At 10.00pm the Doctor reappeared and took the drip out, which made life a little more comfortable. He presents me with my drugs for the next 5 days along with instructions (we did instructions several times because he is Nigerian, I’m guessing, and I’m not). “I will come and see you in the morning – do you want me to leave you a key” says he in a passing sort of way………”erm”…..says I, “I thought I was staying in overnight for observation”. This statement is largely ignored as he passes me a key and wanders off down the corridor with his bag under his arm. I want my money back !

There I am in the medical centre, all alone…….. which was a little odd really…….

The thick plottens:

Next morning I am woken by a colleague who has popped in on his way to the office – it’s 0700hrs and no sign of anyone (and I had forgotten to lock the front door so he just wandered around until he found me !). I got up, cleaned my teeth, got dressed, ate my breakfast (which was delivered from somewhere, although I know not where) and sat watching the telly until the Doctor arrived. Only the cleaners got there before him, at 0830hrs at which point I thought, sod this (I was feeling a little foolish at this point), I could be here all day at this rate – so I wandered back to my room, showered, changed and went to the office, and so beginneth the day after yesterday. More with a fizzle than a bang. I never did see anyone from the medical centre but they didn’t come and hunt me down so I suppose they at least had the right information to send someone a bill. It is worth noting though, if you’re ever in this neck of the woods, that you could rock up at the medical centre door, complain of something debilitating that needs observing, get three meals and a bed for the night and then wander off because at no point did anyone ask to see any ID or proof of what company I worked for, or anything……don’t say I never give you any useful tips !

Otherwise my day has been uneventful, with the usual Sunday office boredom which is exacerbated by not being able to go to site. Lots of people returned from rotation today, and more are due in tomorrow so the day is broken up by people coming and going, saying hello to friends etc. On the flip side, some are leaving tomorrow and I won’t see them for well over 6 weeks by the time I get back, and then they’ll be thinking about going again.

We did managed to by-pass the BBC’s iplayer restrictions on the internet and had the F1 GP on the wireless – which was nice, and then I came back to my room and channel hopped until I found the final stage of the Tour de France (with Arabic commentary) – which was funny (Go Cav !). Then out for a trip to the opera, a little light supper, a club and home to bed…….sorry, drifted off there for a minute – dinner and room for blog writing, a bit of “bookin”, the end of Godfather 2, some of my Magic Mountain and lights out by 9.30 I guess.

You never know though, several times since I have been here, friends have popped up from all over the place for a chat on either Facebook or Skype. Both of those have been a God send, especially for the family to chat live on webcams. The kids have enjoyed the chance to see Daddy (I had to go back and give myself a capital D then…..whatever was I thinking), usually lying on his bed semi-naked………I think Tracey has enjoyed those opportunities as well but she’s much to sensible to admit it !

Some acquaintances have emerged as friends as well which has been a pleasant diversion. Some friends have proved that they are friends and some friends have been much to busy…….who shall be getting a jolly stiff talking too when I get home, I can tell you !

Today’s inventory:

4 cigars – well, I was bored….what can I say

0 units – I think my stomach could do with a bloody great Brandy, just to settle it down, and whilst we’re on the subject, I wouldn’t like to add up the number of people who have mentioned red wine in their get well messages and got me wondering……..did I have some sort of reputation ?

$0 dollars

0 trips to the gym – I’m on short rations at the gym for a few days because as much good as it was doing some parts of my body I’m sure it wasn’t aiding recovery of other bits either

Weather – scorchio (again – tut)

Food – hospital food is crap the world over. The problem with that out here is that it’s just the same as most of the other meals we get…….which is a bit of a worry really.

Countdown – days to go…….coming soon !

My photo this evening is of the moon – as full as a great big full thing, not a cloud in sight and next to no light pollution. It just caught my eye as I came back from dinner.



Night all.